The way it makes me feel

"Have u ever had such feeling when u can say "on top of the world"....you know this feeling that makes u feel totally complete...united with the entire world, universe, god. Something so big and divine. It's a feeling when you understand that you are alone but in a same time u r a part of something big and permanent. It's something bigger than love, something that means FOREVER and belongs to universe. And you feel as a part of it. You feel light inside of you and you feel you can share it with everyone, you do it and it gives you some much. It's what movies make me feel, what art makes me feel... I just stand over there under the lights and with camera on me and i know this is life. It's something magical that you create and give to the camera. I am not just there, I give part of me to every second of it, I create somebody else who is not me but in same time she looks like me and has my voice. It's like another life, something else. It's like in one life you have so many others and they all look like you. It's magical. It's something you have done. It makes you heart jump and respect yourself more because you worth it, because you can do it and because you wanted it and you did it. You just stand over there with projectors on you an it's not a dream its the reality that you truly love..." Saidah Jules


At present I am shooting for my upcoming film "On the ramp". Our second schedule. With Ranvir Shorey. Shooting in Mumbai and leaving for London as well. 


Than some more news to come...;-)
Love to all

Saidah Jules

"Miracles...do happen"

Miracles

Did you ever wondered what is a miracle and if it happens? If we google word "miracle" Wikipedia is coming up with an answer that "A miracle often denotes an event attributed to divine intervention". So it means some sort of a divine touch I would say. There are many interesting stories you can find in internet and even if you read whole definition of miracles on Wikipedia but I am here to write my own thought and my own story be cause everything else you can google without me being there. 


As a spiritual person I do believe that everything we do has an energy and everything happens to us has an energy. Universe is an energy and God is an energy. So everything around us and we ourself is an energy and we are all are parts of one big energy if to say it in a simple language. If you are spiritual person whenever you go to temple or church or mosque or any religious place you can feel very different over there, you can feel that beautiful divine energy. And i think thats why a lot of people go there, just to feel it as it gives you peace, harmony and maybe even feeling of love, protection, etc. You can name it anything. So if to go directly to the "main course" without any "starter" as it's just a blog and not a book, let me tell you this...


According to my opinion and my visualization of life Miracle is anything that has divine energy in it and that makes you feel truly "happy". By "happy" I mean many things as for each and every person happiness has a different meaning. In my definition we will be thinking that happiness is a feeling of "blissful light" inside of you, when you feel "piece of God" inside of you. As you know we are all are created by God and we are all parts of this unique huge divine energy so when you do feel like one thats what I call happiness ("inner happiness"). 


Sometimes....you just life and life moves on and goes on and you dream about something. People do come and tell you that it's not possible and it will never happens but you keep dreaming. Than you meet people and they give you different opinions and judge and they think they are the best to know everything. But you still dreaming and than you want it so much.....and you wish for it not be cause you want to possess it or to prove anything to anybody, you just want it be cause you truly love it and be cause it's the only one thing you truly love and it doesn't matter who thinks what, you keep loving what you love and you keep dreaming about it and whatever you do you do just do it. And than you remember all fairy tales you read in childhood and you do realize they still do lead your life. And one day you meet more people who tells you its not possible be cause all dreams are not realistic. But than question arises....what is realistic? yes we are all people but who created us? who decides what is realistic and what is not? who? Why we think that north is north and west is west? be cause we have been told from the beginning that north is north. But if we all die tomorrow and new generation comes and they will be told that north is west and west is north than it will be their reality. So who are we to know what is real and what is not? Whenever anybody tells me it's not real how do they know my reality? Or when we say anything to others, how do we know? Let me tell you one thing.... whatever you believe in it's real. And it's not an allusion. But you have to believe in it from your heart. It has to be inside of your soul....where God is. And one day.....when you don't expect it anymore and when you probably started to think that it is unreal but you still do have a hope.... it happens....Universe comes to you and tells you that it is real be cause you are the one who created it and you dream becomes reality, it becomes real to everybody now. But before they were saying it's unreal... This is what I call Miracle. 


Miracle is a gift that Universe (God) sends you or bless you with. You can't pray and ask for it, you have to deserve it. It's karmic, it's energy. Everything has a rule and system works the way it does. Miracle is a divine gift, a blessing. 


Miracles happen every day but we are too blind to see them....every person comes to this world every second, sun is shining, kids are laughing and playing, flowers are blooming and this is life. It's beautiful and it is a blessing to be here and experience it. 


I think the best feeling I had and the best things I achieved so far in my life is my work and show business. When you shoot for a movie and whole unit is there and you are on set and all lights and camera on you and than you create another person, another you on screen its a wonderful feeling. And when you watch yourself on a big screen and see that another "you" that someone you created it's magical. And when so many people are coming and telling you beautiful things of cause you feel so blessed and flattered. When you shoot and big crowd comes to meet you and you see genuine feelings in their eyes. And than you feel how much you can do for them, how you can do better things and make this world a better place to be. It's the best feeling in the world. It's something I always knew will be worth it for me to be here. All these people do inspire me to grow more and make all my goals come true. And it's a magical feeling when you do see yourself on big screen and know that you did it. Maybe it was hard work or maybe it was a miracle. 


But...what a really true miracle is........


One day you meet a person.....just one simple person.....and you look at him, you look into his eyes and than everything is changing around you and you feel that entire world and universe is around and there is nothing else you need anymore......Thats the real miracle....when you can feel the entire world and universe just in one person and when nothing else matters. It will never go be cause it's inside of you. And if it ever leaves, it will always come back be cause it's truly yours. It will be always with you and you will be always too.


I am thankful to God for sending miracles into my life...
And I am thankful to him to inspire me every day for everything I do...
If I would not love I would never be Saidah Jules...


I wish you all to be open for miracles in your life. Just let them happens. 


Love, 
Saidah Jules

Hi Folks
I guess a lot of settings in my blog had changed and I am not really sure how it will look now. I got a lot of offers for my personal web site but as I was saying earlier I think its not a right time as yet. I will definitely come up with my personal web site but after some time. Now at present. I also have very particular ideas about my site and it has a lot of flash and dreamwork and animations. So....not now.

I guess I did not write since my birthday...uhhh....i am a grown up girl now :-)

As always....some drama....sometimes I think my life could be converted into big TV serial with some new genre or a lot of feature films could be shot....or maybe books written.

Anyway... whats at present and at present it's film "Kaanch". Kalpana Lajmi is director and we are going on floor next month...may. At present I am busy with workshops. I think about story and what it is about actually I will write some other time. It's a new film I am working on exactly right now. I will definitely write more about it but not right now.

Love
Saidah Jules

Thank you all for birthday wishes. 17.12.2011

Hi folks. I started youtube channel. Its called SaidahJules ("SaidahJules"). Check it out.

http://www.youtube.com/user/SaidahJules?feature=watch

And here there's is a video for u:-)

Love to all

Saidah Jules

New film "On the ramp" and few daily days....Eid Mubarak?

Hi folks

I am doing on more film in India and it's Bollywood movie called "On the ramp". Directed by Imran Khalid and my co-stars are Ranvir Shorey and Urvashi Sharma. I am playing fashion designer and feel really excited about it. Wonder why? xoxoxoxxoxo. It was my childhood dream to be a fashion designer and I was always fascinated towards it but destiny took me into another direction. So here I am now to be fashion designer in a movie:-) The movie should by released in feb or something like that. So, thats the news.

Also, recently went for a new restaurant lounge opening in Mumbai, called Le Monde. It's in Juhu opposite Penne restaurant. Le Monde is really lovely place with yummy italian continental cuisine and interesting design. It belongs to my friends and in particular to a good friend of mine Swaraj Kapoor (putting our pic from event). It was really nice evening and it was nice to catch up with Swaraj and Yuvraj Singh as well. From Le Monde I had to rush to another event and it was 1st look of my upcoming film Jal. We had a big get together in Sun and Sand hotel in Juhu. Good for me these two places are very closed to each other, so timing was good. Finally I saw all Jal's promos and I liked it. Loved it. And it was great to know that everybody loved it as well. I think my movie "On the ramp" will be released before Jal but Jal is like my first project and I literally put more than my heart into it. Sonu Nigam did amazing song "Jal de", it's a promo as well and it gives very massive effect. Loved it. I adore Sonu Nigam and was nice to meet him in personal finally after such a long time of working on a same movie. He is such a wonderful and adorable person.

What else is happening in my life? As always many things. Sometimes I just wonder what is more happening and more exciting prof life or private life? xoxoxoxoxo. Sometimes I have a feeling that actually the movie is my normal daily life and whenever I am on set thats the life. LOL. If somebody ever run out of scripts, guys, please come to me, I have so much to say and my life is like big dramatic TV serial. :-)

As I always say the most important thing in life is experience, its about feeling the present moment and living in it. It really doesn't matter what you do or what you achieve or what other people thing. It's all about what you feel and how you feel. When we die it doesn't matter how much money you earned or fame and all such stuff, but it matters what you experienced and what person you was. It's all about soul.

It looks like in Mumbai most of people are obsessed with fame and being known and many girls think that they will meet some big producer or director and for various silly reasons he will made her a star. It's silly and naive. It's not that easy and simple. Anyway, I don't want to get into that topic right now cuz i will write about it separately later one.

It's Eid right now and I can say Eid Mubarak to all muslims. But as well what truly makes me sad is that there are so many sheep who r getting killed. I know it's probably sound stupid. But my heart breaks when I hear one day before all that sound "beeee beeee beee" that sheep makes near my building ( I live in area where there are a lot of them before Eid). And I see so many of them and next day they are all dad for a holiday and you can see blood on the road. And than people say "Eid Mubarak". It's sad, guys. Seriously. I probably would never think about and I don't care if you are veg or non-veg. Personally I am vegetarian but thats not the point. It's just pretty sad to see all this picture of little insecure animals one day and next day no more sound cuz they r are dead and blood on the road. I hope I will not get critized for writing this but it's from my heart. I don't judge any religion and thats not the point. It's not about a religion at all. Please all get me right over here. It's about what I feel as it's my personal blog. I am sorry but I don't actually feel like saying Eid Mubarak cuz I just remember all this animals what I saw few days ago and now their blood and etc. It's just sad for me. Please note that I don't say anything about muslims or religion, it's just my personal experience of what I feel. Just wonder how a man can hit and kill innocent animal.....thats it.

As you all know I am hindu by religion and thats i guess the reason for me being vegetarian and follow the life style I do. I am absolutely cool with anyone but killing innocent animals just really made me sad. When you don't see its cool, but when it's like near your building.

Anyway..........good people always counts.

Love you all

Saidah Jules

Diwali time.....blessings and regrets

Hi folks. It's a big hindu festival and I wish you all Happy Diwali. It's hindu New Year.

So....HAPPY DIWALI.

I think it's very special and significant time cuz it gives you such feel of changing everything for good. If you are already happy than you can just move into a new level and if you are than you can always start or create a new one. Actually I am really looking for 2012 to start and leave 2011 in past, even thought it was generally a good year for me and "Jal" was the biggest thing that happened (the shoot i mean) but it was a big process of experience and self rediscovery. "Jal" is not only one prof thing that I did obviously and there are others as well but I don't talk about it unless it's about to release. I did write a lot about "Jal" cuz it touched me a lot and that time in a desert for 40 days was something "out of the world experience". It was like you are living in a desert, experiencing that life, seeing people in villagers, and you connect to yourself so much cuz its only you and the desert and your feelings and your emotions. I dont think i was really to interact with all my feelings and emotions but I had no choice. And with all this you also doing your work and have to do it at your level best. So that time is very precious to me and everything what I learn over there and probably there is nobody who ever seen so much of me and my emotions as Girish Malik......i believe we will work again :-) But actually all creative people are a bit mad........cuz talent is madness I suppose. But thats actually a very beautiful feeling when all ur emotions and feelings just get on a surface of a land. No matter how many movies I will do and etc but "Jal" is something that made a big changes in me as it was destiny. And the story was significant to me and related to many things in my life that I associated it with. It was probably the most important thing this year but I would not like to go through it again (i mean of living there and be exposed to urself). Probably one day I will be in Bhuj and will be remembering how we were shooting and where but let it remains as an experience.

I had very nice interview yesterday. It was for Germany. Was happy to have intelligent conversation about beauty and many different things. I don't know why people are scared of being honest and speak their mind. If you ask me what I think I tell you what I think, if you are not ready to hear than don't ask but I believe in being true to yourself. My way of living was always following your heart and say what you think and I guess it was always working for me as practice shows.

As life is always a balance, I met some amazing people and had some bad experience as well. Probably it's better not to focus on negative part as it was learning experience. There was one guy who was and still is using my photos for his "beautiful publicity" or I don't know how to call it. Let's not use his name as such people are not worth it to be names. He clicked pix with me and posted all over facebook and tells we are dating or whatever, and he put so many pictures that for every normal person it really looks as we do. But....THATS NOT TRUE. I just randomly know him and never thought that someone can do such a silly thing. Thats embarrasing and it's actually harassement. It's exactly what I was talking about in my previous post. He probably feels very happy that all people in his area and on facebook think that he has something to do with me. I obviously tried to report all pix to facebook but no results and he blocked me but still using the pix. It really makes me feel sad when there are such elements who spread rumours and infact makes it. He is just acquitance.........I was writing about it in previous post and now there is a perfect example. So.....I am not in relationship and not dating and it was totally rubbish. But it was learning experience. In whole my life never had it before but now I generally scared of clicking pictures with people cuz next day they just can post it and say something that is not there.

But also I met amazing people recently........Will see how things go and hopefully after couple of months I will write something very beautiful.

The best thing that happened recently is that I met and "Angel" :-))) after whole year :-) It was great and beautiful. I felt blessed and it was lots of harmony and it was just beautiful. The most beautiful thing in life is when you feel divine energy. It's a blessing to know somebody who thinks exactly like you and you have such a similar character. And even though you don't spend much time together due to film industry and shooting but you are always connected and always in touch no matter where the shoot is. And when you get a time to meet its sooooo soooo beautiful and special. I am really happy that there are people in my life who like me the way I am and who is just there. As I never write names in my blog I am not going to do it :-) I think it's wrong to disturb somebodies privacy and use names. At least I never use names in my blog as it's my personal interaction and I dont make news of my personal life. I share my experience and the way I am.

Maybe one say when I will be pretty old woman I will write a book with all reality how it is, was and will be and will include real people in it:-)

I am uploading a video and suggest to everybody to watch it. It's just beautiful song.

Happy Diwali. I wish you all to be honest to yourself and be honest to the world around, we are in charge on our destiny and we should always be loyal to ourselves.

Lots of Love

Saidah Jules

"Jealousy...Being beautiful"

Hi folks

I just want to share with you a "simply life" of a beautiful girl (or any person i am sure).

If God made you beautiful that obviously you should be thankful to Him for this cuz if I was not beautiful than I guess nothing in my life would be the way it is. Thats true that beauty opens many doors and if you are also intelligent than it opens really many doors. People always give you priority if you look beautiful. In school, in college, in University, at work and of cause in private life every guy will be after you as well. I dont know anybody who would not like it. I think my modeling career happen cuz i look photogenic and beautiful in pictures. In acting as well, apart of acting talent looking good on screen is important. People always like to see you around and etc etc etc. Whatever I am now and whatever I have now it's only because I am beautiful person and I am thankful to God he made me that way. But let's not stress out on this. There is another side that people don't know.

Another side is ... JEALOUSY.

I know thousands of people and ask me how many are my true friends? Who is that genuine friend who is there for me for share happiness and when i am down. I can tell you one hand is more that enough to count that people. All others are acquaintance and they are jealous. And you deal with this shit every day.

Especially jealous girls, its normally very small people who tries to send you different small shit and they believe it affects you? For example you are shooting and than a girl (who works with u or from same field) come and says like "Oh wow, Saidah, you put on weight sooooooo much". But you know you are same as before. Believe me people, whenever someone is jealous they always tell you this or talk about weight or pick up all such similar topics. But when someone wants to be nice they say "Oh, Saidah, you lost so much weight". But the point is that i am always the same, 1 kg always comes and goes but its not visible normally. So always remember, if someone is a bitch she says "u put on weight" and if someone wants to pretend to be nice it will be "you lost weight".

Another part is rumors. Yes ofcuz, it cant be without them. And normally it's a bad rumors and based on sex topic as a rule. As Mumbai is a small city and showbiz in general it's gonna be like this.... whenever you are seen with a guy it means you are sleeping together. It can't be you relative, your friend, your co-star or just professional meeting...it just can't be that way. It HAS TO be that you are sleeping together. And if even you dare to have a picture together...FOR SURE it's love forever and you gonna die same day and you are secretly married. It's just be a simple picture with a friend or just with a person, it always has to be more...MUCH MORE behind it. And if you are spotted in a restaurant or coffee shop in a hotel...THATS A CRIME!!! it means you were in a room and came down to eat. Secret love affair has been disclosed.

SO....got me people?

So.....some of your "friends" will always bitch a bout you. Thats the fact....Or some of them might even ask for help and than they will just dessapear. Or some "friends" will copy you. Sometimes it's very funny to see how you female "friends" try to copy you or your ideas. But the idea is they pretend to be your friends;-)))) but they will be the first to put you down as well.

So....what next? A movie.....if by any chance you got a good work than it's be cause you slept with producer or director. It just can't be cuz of your personality, your work experience, your performance or you look. Its only cuz you slept with someone. Probably if everything was so simply that every second girl in Mumbai would be a real actress and we could see them on screen but unfortunately for them sex is not the key for success. To become somebody takes much much more than all this all together.

To all people I would say that before you speak you should always ask yourself what for you are doing it and what energy you send to the world? If to spread rumors or talk rubbish makes you really happy human being but def do it and we are ready to put our names on it but I doubt it really does. Every person has their own path, the way, their situations in life and everything. We should never judge and we should focus on our things. There is only one thing that distroys everything..its JEALOUSY.

I wish everybody not to be jealous. It's a really a horrible thing. People should be realistic and down to earth. It's very important to see the truth and not that you want to see.

Before talking bad about others just ask yourself if you are perfect? Or what would you do? I really do believe this world can be better than it is if jealousy would not be part of it.

I don't understand why everybody wants to be models in Mumbai? why? If you want to be glamourous than just be no matter what work you do. You can always dress up well and put makeup on if you are a woman. You don't need to be a model for it. In fact most of models looks very ordinary in life.

Why every guy in Mumbai think that girls are fall in love with good looking guys? let me tell you that it's about brains. It doesnt matter how many muscles you have. it's all about ur brains and intelligence and the way you are. Just be yourself and be a man. It's that simple.

Also it happens with jealous guys that.....when they like someone and can't be with that person they will always talk bad about that girl and ofcuz that they slept together, had affair and that girl is after him but he is such a hero and doesn't wanna be with her. There are almost thousands of guys in Mumbai who "was with me" but the point i don't know 99% of them. :-) Thats the point - people love to make stories when they are jealous and as a rule it has to be based on sex.

And the last thing - if you are beautiful you can't be intelligent. You can't can't be smart and educated. So if beautiful person does business as well than it is something very suspicious cuz beautiful females can't be smart. It's very hard to accept for a man that actually they can and they can compete with them. So it's a scary thing for a man to accept that a woman actually can be more powerful.

So....with all this shit I have to deal all the time........and what do I do? DON'T BOTHER.

I am happy with the way I look and the way I am. If someone doesn't like it than...."the exit door is over there". And i am not gonna sit at home just because if I go to restaurant in hotel some limited minded people will think I came down from upstairs. No way. Life is always moving on and there is life behind everything.

The main point in life and the way to be happy is to live life you have and to be the person you and to be content and enjoy your own life. Not others people, UR OWN.

And the last thing - nobody can make you a star ....that magical light comes from inside of the person. Certain people can show you but nobody can make you somebody if you are not somebody yourself.

Life your own life and be happy with what you have. Jealousy never made anybody better human being or a happy person.

Love to all

Saidah Jules