Sunday, August 30, 2009
Today I discovered something what really made me think and understand certain people I had in my life. And I am sure this artickle will be quite usefull to many people.Sometimes in life we meet people and we think of them like they are crazy or something and give us stress and etc etc etc. We might think that we dont connect and that person has bad charakter or something and etc etc etc and we might think like "he is an asshole or she is a bitch", but in reality it can be something else. After I got this information I realize that we never should think bad about someone who "talks differently" and just do something what we suppose don't. Ofcuz there are people with very low IQ level and no manners but also there is one mental sickness. It's not like many people have it ofcuz, but still...........we might meet such people sometimes in life. There is one sickness what calls "Borderline Personality Disorder"."SYMPTOMS OF BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER"By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. June 22, 2007 The main feature of borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a pervasive pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships, self-image and emotions. People with borderline personality disorder are also usually very impulsive. This disorder occurs in most by early adulthood. The unstable pattern of interacting with others has persisted for years and is usually closely related to the person’s self-image and early social interactions. The pattern is present in a variety of settings (e.g., not just at work or home) and often is accompanied by a similar lability (fluctuating back and forth, sometimes in a quick manner) in a person’s emotions and feelings. Relationships and the person’s emotion may often be characterized as being shallow.A person with this disorder will also often exhibit impulsive behaviors and have a majority of the following symptoms:Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating) Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days) Chronic feelings of emptiness Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights) Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms Details about Borderline Personality Disorder SymptomsFrantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment.The perception of impending separation or rejection, or the loss of external structure, can lead to profound changes in self-image, emotion, thinking and behavior. Someone with borderline personality disorder will be very sensitive to things happening around them in their environment. They experience intense abandonment fears and inappropriate anger, even when faced with a realistic separation or when there are unavoidable changes in plans. For instance, becoming very angry with someone for being a few minutes late or having to cancel a lunch date. People with borderline personality disorder may believ that this abandonment implies that they are “bad.” These abandonment fears are related to an intolerance of being alone and a need to have other people with them. Their frantic efforts to avoid abandonment may include impulsive actions such as self-mutilating or suicidal behaviors.Unstable and intense relationships.People with borderline personality disorder may idealize potential caregivers or lovers at the first or second meeting, demand to spend a lot of time together, and share the most intimate details early in a relationship. However, they may switch quickly from idealizing other people to devaluing them, feeling that the other person does not care enough, does not give enough, is not “there” enough. These individuals can empathize with and nurture other people, but only with the expectation that the other person will “be there” in return to meet their own needs on demand. These individuals are prone to sudden and dramatic shifts in their view of others, who may alternately be seen as beneficient supports or as cruelly punitive. Such shifts other reflect disillusionment with a caregiver whose nurturing qualities had been idealized or whose rejection or abandonment is expected.Identity disturbance.There are sudden and dramatic shifts in self-image, characterized by shifting goals, values and vocational aspirations. There may be sudden changes in opinions and plans about career, sexual identity, values and types of friends. These individuals may suddenly change from the role of a needy supplicant for help to a righteous avenger of past mistreatment. Although they usually have a self-image that is based on being bad or evil, individuals with borderline personality disorder may at times have feelings that they do not exist at all. Such experiences usually occur in situations in which the individual feels a lack of a meaningful relationship, nurturing and support. These individuals may show worse performance in unstructured work or school situations. How to understand people with borderline personality disorder ?There are three major areas that those with Borderline Personality Disorder have serious issues with. Those are long and established instability in interpersonal relationships*convoluted self image*extreme fluctuation of emotionsInterpersonal relationships are very tough for a person with Borderline Personality Disorder. They often take frantic and drastic measures to avoid imagined or real abandonment. For example, if a spouse calls and is going to be late for dinner because traffic is at a stand still this can cause a severe reaction for someone with Borderline Personality Disorder. They take this as a personal abandonment issue and assume the spouse is late because of something they have done. Patients with Borderline Personality Disorder don't want to be left alone, especially when there was an appointed time to be with someone.People who suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder tend to pour out their soul to others and then accept caregivers or others to focus completely on them. They may switch back and forth as they perceive that others are not caring enough or understanding the issues. One day they perceive someone as their best friend and the next they have become the worst enemy. The only change is the perception of the Borderline Personality Disorder patient. They tend to share personal issues and then imagine that others all know and are talking about those personal thoughts. A person with Borderline Personality Disorder may seem very shallow to others and they are often focused on themselves.Self image is a serious problem for those with Borderline Personality Disorder. There are drastic and sudden shifts in values and morals. They may switch from a needy self loathing person to a perceived super hero out to save the world. The tendency is most of the time they have a very low self image of evil or bad. Often there are suicide attempts and self mutilation behaviors.Borderline Personality Disorder patients often display impassivity. They may drive recklessly, gamble, spend money they don't have, binge eat, or have substance abuse issues.Extreme emotional outbursts are common. They don't usually last a long time for the person with Borderline Personality Disorder, but they are extreme in nature and happen on a regular basis.To deal with a person who has been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder one should be a steady rock. The term most used is non-wavering. With all the ups and downs they experience the people around them should remain the same. That is much easier said than done. Basically their behavoir is reported back to them and they are treated like children. They are given respect, but no excuses. Many professionals have a hard time treating these people because they are often the object of rage and outburstsP.S. After reading all this I dont really know what we should do if we have such people in life or somehow come across. As a human being I feel to say that I should help and etc, but in normal practical life I guess it would happen diffrently..............
Monday, August 10, 2009
It's have been a while I was absent. I did not write for a long. I think whole last month I was lost "somewhere". And before as well. Many things had been happening and I believe they are still happening. Lots of things have been descovered and archieved....mentally and phisically.
First of all my shoot for "Pyar Imposible" ( hindi Bollywood film) was fun, it was really cool expirience. This film will be released in november this year. And in october I have release of 'Right ya wrong" with Sunny Deol and etc. It was nice to shoot with Priyanka Chopra, Uday Chopra and Dino Morea. Really cool guys. Had really nice time together. Than I had been shooting in Delhi and had absolutely no time to check even my gmail. But I think it was wrong, I believe in our century people always should be able to stay "online and connected" especially now its very available on any electronical device.
It was also heavy raining in Mumbai. At the end of july my friend Angela came over to Mumbai for a while. I was very busy with her and with certain issues. Actually this time was quite hard and lots of depressions were going on and some missunderstanding, stress and etc etc etc. Everything bad what can happen I guess. It's always very hard to loose people whom u love and care about......We also have been traveling for a while....but unfortunately I have sad memories and feelings about it. Sometimes when u let person come to ur heart it can hurt a lot.... Now i have a sister as I bought rakhi for Angela :-) But as well good things happens. Suddently my good friend rockstar Vivek came back in Mumbai from holidays. I was very glad to meet him after a long time, I can always feel lots of positive energy from him and we always have kind of spiritual conversations. I respect him for that.
But also with all this what have made me so busy last two month there is something one, very very special. I have an angel in my life. And I'm very happy that God made him come to this world and be part of my life......always and forever. I always thankfull to God for this gift and blessing. So......Angel gifted me a book " Many lives, Many masters" by Dr. Brian Weiss. It's amazing book. I just completed reading it. It's a book about reincarnation and the point of life, about relations and etc. It's really amazing book, it gave me so much of knowledge, i really discovered quite a lot. I have always believed in reincartions and that sometimes we meet people in our present life whom we already knew from previous and etc. Our soul is eternal and it keeps travel in times.........it keeps to learn, to grow, to improve and be better. I believe in karma, to be good person and do good things. Actually it doesnt matter where u reach in life and etc, all what matters are ur feelings and what energy u have in u. I never get angry at people, in fact I love people a lot. Recently i heard amazingly wise statement "How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.” I liked this statement a lot. I think we always should be focused on being good and doing good, reacting good and what also matters a lot - having good thoughts and good intentions. In buddhism there is a lot about it. Whatever u say u have to mean it and thinking has to be positive. I always try to be better than I am and create positive energy around me. At the moment I have too many philosophical thoughts and it's kind of mess. I really have been missing writing due to my busy days. Just this book "Many lives, many masters" inspired me a lot and gave me answers for certain questions I had in my head.
Sometimes we meet people who give us wisdom, who makes us better than we are or who show us the right path. We can call them gurus or masters..........I have one life now.......maybe its the last one. But i met people who made a big impact on my life, who showed me right things in life and who helped me to become a person I am today and I also have such people now in my life, who can always give u right advice in right time and who can help u when u need........I am very thankfull to Angel in my life who gifted me this book. Thanx to him and all my blessings.
Soon I plan to go for holidays in Europe and visit my family. It's have been a while.........
Love to all